WHY CAN'T THIS BE EASY???

Agh here I am crying as I write this post.

We had made a decision - not to go ASAP - but as soon as the decision was made and clinic contacted I have begun to question this decision - MY HEART IS SO SO SO SO SO SO SO TORN

AF decided to show today as I figured she would - if I go in March - I HAVE to decide by tomorrow - I am just waiting from my clinic for protocol dates - I would have to start estrace again tomorrow - AGGGHHHH I don't know what to do

DH (dear husband) is just as torn - and together we are the most indecisive couple that has ever existed…. Why can't there be an easy answer?????

Why are we here 5.5 years into trying to have a baby - blessed with one little boy who I can't even describe how much I love him -but we I KNOW our family isn't complete…..

But this is emotionally draining, physically draining, financially draining - I think DH had a bit of break down tonight - those were partially his words - its true - I love our journey - but how long can one go on for? How many times does one try? How much money do you spend? When do you stop and say be happy with what you have and move on.

So much I can ramble about - so torn - I wish the answer was easy….

Contact me!

I know I have followers - and comments tend to get lost or you may not want to post questions publicly. 

Please feel free to contact me! 

Roadtoafamily@gmail.com 

I look forward to hearing from you 

Xo

The dreaded 2ww............has now come to an end

Well - transfer done, vaginal tic tacs taken - estrace continued along with vitamins - read into every symptom, feeling, twing and twitch. 

I started taking hpt's on Wednesday, February 18 - a day earlier than scheduled beta = BFN 

February 19 - scheduled beta waiting, waiting by the phone - took another hpt= BFN 

Febraury 20 - another hpt - another BFN - called my G.P. - away on vacation - luckily her partner talked to me and confirmed a negative beta 

I am sad - I really was convinced this cycle worked. 

So we are back to square one like October / what do we do?

I contacted the clinic - I can do another cycle within the next month- im waiting for a couple more answers from my doctor - we will see what he says and we will make a decision from there. 

A huge part of me wants to get on that plane ASAP and do another cycle - but I'm also wondering what's best for my body. 

So many questions, here I come Dr. Google 

Thanks for the prayers and positive thoughts 

Till next time  

XO

February 2015

Well bad bad blogger again 

We are just about done our Mexican adventure again PUPO 

The weather has been great - some of the best we've ever had in Cancun. 

We transferred two great five day blasts again. 

Dr. Pagaza and Dr. Trevino did my transfer again - Dr. Gaytan wasn't at the clinic as he had done a delivery earlier that morning.  

Of course now every ting and pinch and anything I'm thinking oh it's implantation - fingers crossed - I am much more positive this cycle 

I also saw Ricardo from new life clinic this time for laser acupuncture. Man I love laser acupuncture I find it much more relaxing than traditional acupuncture on going to look harder for one at home - hmmmm maybe a new career for me?? 

Anyways I will keep everyone posted my beta  is on the 19th. 

Hugs XO