Wednesday, 25 March 2015

Update, transfer, 2ww, Beta results


Got to Mexico, met with the clinic - had three survive the thaw - we were asked if we wanted to transfer three - after talking with the embryologist - the third wasn't ready enough - and even if it was - it would have been all too risky.

Transferred two, monitored the third overnight - which developed beautifully and ended up refreezing.

Spent a couple quiet days in Cancun.
Went home - had my mother and MIL help me on my restrictive week

Tested early at 6dp5dt - BFN

Took three more - all between 8dp5dt & 11dp5dt - all BFN

Had a feeling my beta would be negative also.

Which was confirmed today -- BFN

Cried my heart out

Time to regroup

Continue our process of moving our embabies to Canada - paperwork is already in motion.

This blog will be quiet for sure for awhile- taking time to ourselves - taking time to get myself fit again (time to finally lose my pregnancy weight from my DS) and then assess our next steps

Thanks for all the love and prayers


Remember - I am still willing and open to talk - so please feel free to email me. 

Wednesday, 11 March 2015

We are going.....ASAP

 Sooooo we've been so busy I've been meaning to update - so while here I am wide awake early in the morning - I figured perfect timing to update! So after my last post - DH (dear husband) and I talked more the next day, part of both of us thought not going wasn't the right decision so we changed our minds and decided to go ASAP. I had recontacted the clinic to let them know we changed our minds and as soon as I did this, it was like the weight of the world was taken off both of our shoulders. So now here we are two days before we head back. My transfer is on Saturday. I had an Ultrasound done this past Friday and everything is looking petfect. My lining is 11mm (YAAAHHHH even a bit thicker than last month) 
So pray pray pray for us that the third time is the charm. 
We have restarted our paperwork to transfer our embryos back to Canada. We have counted since September these  three attempts, between medication, treatment costs and travel (not including time off work) have cost us around $20,000(cdn) YIKES!! So needless to say I'm praying so hard everyday that our third time is the charm because I'm pretty sure any further attempts will be on hold while we save more again. 

So please pray for us - will keep you all updated 


Tuesday, 24 February 2015


Agh here I am crying as I write this post.

We had made a decision - not to go ASAP - but as soon as the decision was made and clinic contacted I have begun to question this decision - MY HEART IS SO SO SO SO SO SO SO TORN

AF decided to show today as I figured she would - if I go in March - I HAVE to decide by tomorrow - I am just waiting from my clinic for protocol dates - I would have to start estrace again tomorrow - AGGGHHHH I don't know what to do

DH (dear husband) is just as torn - and together we are the most indecisive couple that has ever existed…. Why can't there be an easy answer?????

Why are we here 5.5 years into trying to have a baby - blessed with one little boy who I can't even describe how much I love him -but we I KNOW our family isn't complete…..

But this is emotionally draining, physically draining, financially draining - I think DH had a bit of break down tonight - those were partially his words - its true - I love our journey - but how long can one go on for? How many times does one try? How much money do you spend? When do you stop and say be happy with what you have and move on.

So much I can ramble about - so torn - I wish the answer was easy….

Friday, 20 February 2015

Contact me!

I know I have followers - and comments tend to get lost or you may not want to post questions publicly. 

Please feel free to contact me! 

I look forward to hearing from you 


The dreaded 2ww............has now come to an end

Well - transfer done, vaginal tic tacs taken - estrace continued along with vitamins - read into every symptom, feeling, twing and twitch. 

I started taking hpt's on Wednesday, February 18 - a day earlier than scheduled beta = BFN 

February 19 - scheduled beta waiting, waiting by the phone - took another hpt= BFN 

Febraury 20 - another hpt - another BFN - called my G.P. - away on vacation - luckily her partner talked to me and confirmed a negative beta 

I am sad - I really was convinced this cycle worked. 
So we are back to square one like October / what do we do?
I contacted the clinic - I can do another cycle within the next month- im waiting for a couple more answers from my doctor - we will see what he says and we will make a decision from there. 

A huge part of me wants to get on that plane ASAP and do another cycle - but I'm also wondering what's best for my body. 

So many questions, here I come Dr. Google 

Thanks for the prayers and positive thoughts 

Till next time  

Saturday, 14 February 2015

February 2015

Well bad bad blogger again 
We are just about done our Mexican adventure again PUPO 
The weather has been great - some of the best we've ever had in Cancun. 

We transferred two great five day blasts again. 
Dr. Pagaza and Dr. Trevino did my transfer again - Dr. Gaytan wasn't at the clinic as he had done a delivery earlier that morning.  

Of course now every ting and pinch and anything I'm thinking oh it's implantation - fingers crossed - I am much more positive this cycle 

I also saw Ricardo from new life clinic this time for laser acupuncture. Man I love laser acupuncture I find it much more relaxing than traditional acupuncture on going to look harder for one at home - hmmmm maybe a new career for me?? 

Anyways I will keep everyone posted my beta  is on the 19th. 

Hugs XO 

Sunday, 25 January 2015

So the super overdue update

Ok - I've been an AWFUL "blogger" I know last time I left was whoas of an IF - waiting for AF
Well she showed up that day - we started out drugs - I am going to make this update very brief - Got to Cancun - had an amazing vacation with DH & DS - LOVED watching him play on the beach - had transferred two very healthy embryos - and I am sad to say our cycle didn't work. Heartbreaking yes - but something deep down inside of me since transfer day told me it hadn't worked.

So NOW here is the New Year! We have decided to give it a go again - and we will be in Cancun for our transfer for February 10.

Took my Lupron last weekend - started Estrace on Friday - I don't remember it affecting me this much in the fall - I've had a daily headache - and the hot flashes - oooohhh weeeee - pray for my DH the next couple weeks hahaha.

I am looking forward to my trip - I am sad that DS isn't coming with us - but the flight back is just too much for DH as I can't lift anything post transfer - dealing with the stroller, car seat, suitcase and a VERY active toddler was too much - so he is having a trip to babcia and dzadza - they are beyond excited to have him - I want him there with us so much - but I know it will be more relaxing and a little less stressful without him.

Wish us luck! Will keep you all posted